Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Review - Lucha Libre Taco Shop

so. youve heard of lucha libre taco shop, eh? you probably saw it on man vs. food. and youve probably heard about how awesome it is. i sure have. i actually went there once probably about 2 years ago. it was great. i remember everything being very fresh, very flavorful, and everything was cooked nicely. the people were friendly, it was clean. today, i saw that the test of time is a tough one for some places to pass. and that phoning it in is basically the protocol at this once potential-ridden taco shop...

Gourmet Taco Shop my ASS.

it started off kinda rough, upon entry we noticed that the general upkeep was a little lacking. the floor was dirty, the unused tables were covered in crap. the line of people waiting to order was moving fairly slow. once we reached the counter to order, the (white) guy working the register did not ask me what i wanted. he did no say hi. he didnt say anything, he just stared at me with an annoyed look on his face waiting for me to stop wasting his precious time, and so kindly hurry the fuck up and order. i ordered the "queso taco" and the "surfing california" burrito, and added rice and beans with a soda to the burrito for an extra 3 dollars. the disgruntled employee lazily threw down a tray on the counter, lunged some napkins and salsa containers onto it, didnt repeat my order, didnt tell me the price, just swiped my card, put down the reciept, snippily slammed a pen down for me to sign it. then carried on to the next asshole trying to ruin his wonderful day. we sat down outside on the patio and waited for our names to be called, mine came up pretty quickly. now when i went to retrieve my salsas from their salsa bar, i noticed again, general upkeep and cleanliness is a FAIL. dirty as fuck. like i really wanna get salsa from the gross pit of slop that they are held in. im sure the sneeze guard really keeps it clean though. i didnt bother to take a picture though.

my food.
mmmm. look at that! crispy cheese in the taco! oh....and dry...tough...unseasoned steak. and....super acidic cream sauce. and, wait, whats that? boring wedge of avocado with no salt on it either?!?! YIPPEY KAYAY KIYOH MOTHERFUCKER!!! WE ARE REALLY COOKING NOW!!! fuck you. and then there was this.
the surf and turf california burrito. and rice and beans. cold, boring rice and beans. and steak and shrimp and unmelted cheese and hair. wait, what? oh yea. hair? yes. hair. i didnt get a picture of it because i was too busy being so furious that i took it up to the counter and set my plate down, picked up the burrito, grabbed the hair, and slowly pulled it out of my food. it was about 4 inches long. the guy working the counter just about shit himself. i think i could actually hear his asshole tighten up, then release. the fucked up part is that seconds before the hair discovery, i was admitting to allison how bummed i was that the place had gone down hill and i felt like they were just phoning it in. and then, bam. hurr. they all scambled around and about 4 employees stopped to look at the hair, then look at me, as if i had planted it there. they offered me a new one or something. i say, sure, ill take a new one, box it up to go please. they gave it to me. i didnt even look at it. i just deposited it into a garbage can infront of a Chase about an hour later. i figured a hobo would fish it out later at some point.

oh yea, allison got cheese enchilada.
they just look off putting, dont they? same flacid rice and beans. but something about the sauce. it was sweet. like, really, really, really sweet. unbearably so. it was fucking disgusting. allison took about 4 bites and then that was about the time i had the hair incident. so basically, my judgement is this. FUCK YOU LUCHA LIBRE TACO SHOP. YOU FUCKING SUCK. NO ONE EVER GO HERE, THE SERVICE SUCKS, THE FOOD IS SHIT. FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU. you piece of shit loser working the counter, grow some fucking balls and have some customer service you fucking low life. ive never been so upset about a meal in my entire life. i hope your shithole continues down the path that its so clearly on, and soon turns into a fucking roach motel, just with brighter colors.

fuck you.

Lucha Libre Taco Shop
1810 West Washington Street
San Diego, CA, 92103

www.tacosmackdown.com

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